Wednesday, May 19, 2010


Success! Thanks to Hubby having to work a double shift today (meaning that he had to rise and shine at 4AM), Leila slept in her crib last night! Now, before you get too excited (OK, maybe it's just her own mother relishing in this), it was only a 3-hour success. But I'll take it! After Leila's 2AM feeding, she was noisy enough that we went into the nursery to allow Hubby a couple of hours to sleep. Oh, this was going to be a challenge. You should know, Hubby and I have had a hard time putting Leila to bed in the crib. Call it anxiety or call it wanting to stay in our comfort zone - after all, she calms so quickly in her little comfy lambie swing - we (aka Hubby) immediately "rescues" her from the big bad crib after about, oh, 60 seconds. And if the rescue isn't so swift, Daddy is planted at cribside, hovering over the edge of crib watching Leila's every move with the baby monitor held directly up to his ear like a cell phone.

So, back to last night...out of pure fatigue, I put her in the crib without reservation and flopped my tired self into the big girl bed at cribside. I laid there anxiously waiting to see what was about to transpire. Although I was thrilled she didn't start testing the strength of those little lungs, I wasn't in the clear yet. Of course, she was totally fine - just making the sounds babies do when they're settling into sleep. But, let me give you an idea of what was running through my mind...What was *that* noise? Is that normal? I should check on her. No, I cannot check on her - she's fine. Did she just spit up? I should check on her. No, I cannot check on her - she's fine. Was that a pre-meltdown noise? I should check on her. No, I cannot check on her - she's fine. Crap, Hubby has rubbed off on me! I, with my training in child development, am supposed to be the voice of reason. Here I am, laying wide awake (albeit with my eyes closed, as if I'm fooling anyone into thinking that I'm sleeping) worrying about every breath, sound, sneeze, name it. But, as we say in psychology, it's all about the "reframe." So, instead of focusing on having become the ball of nerves I gently tease Hubby about, I'm choosing to enjoy the fact that we made it over a big hurdle last night!

1 comment:

  1. awwwwwwwww.
    I had some tears well up when I read this one. Just knowing how much my brother has grown, not that I had any doubts......and knowing there is some one else feeling the same things.
    I think I'd be more of a wreck than I already am if Gabe had to sleep in another room, but his basinet is next to our bed.
    So congrats to Leila on being a big girl and sleeping in her crib (even if it was for a little bit) and props to you for having the courage and strength for putting her there!
    Its a good milestone